I appear confined to dark rooms
     and late nights and that quiet
          breath houses make when they
               are sleeping.

               I am a biproduct of my surroundings
         and the memories I still have of you
     that leak into thought when my
brain is not sleeping.

I could be angry,
          But that
          takes too
          much
          energy.

Instead I hope to passively upset you
with pointed words excruciatingly chosen
to get a rise out of you so maybe
someday you would know how I feel.
          My only fault in this plan is that
          you know me so well that you
          can see through this scheme.

I miss the moments
     in the dark between
          sleep and awake
               when I am not

               with you but I know
          that you would want me
     to be and that makes me content
knowing how much you love me.

It's as though you knew we would not last
so you took your necklace and shirt back
to avoid all those messy problems
     [you forgot that engagement ring]
                                                        oops.

We fastforwarded our future
beyond years and years
     [
      we planned children
       and dates and times
        and beds and dogs
                                    ]

I do not seem as angry as I should be
     In fact, I do not seem to be feeling much anymore.
     I suppose I have you to thank for that.

You ended all plans for the future on April Fool's Day.
I don't know if you realized that.

(I suppose in the future that will be a laugh[to you] )

I've decided I want to drive and sit in every location
we were together[yes, together] so I can erase
these moments and cleanse my mind.
     But that would require breaking and entering
     into your house and as I said before,
                                                            I do not have
                                                            the energy.
I must be content, and sit in every theatre
watching movies, remembering the times we had.

     It is getting easier to forget you.

No, not forget
but remember
without pain.

     I do not blame myself
     for this ending,
     nor do I blame you.

I just thought you should know.